Thanks for the Memories

The ghosts, goblins, witches, and skeletons have all been taken down and stored away for another year. They left their hay bales, pumpkins, and scarecrows for our fall decorating.

Here comes Autumn

Here in the United States that means Thanksgiving is a mere, twenty-three days away. Christmas will be right behind. One holiday at a time though please.

A sampling of a Thanksgiving feast.

A sampling of a Thanksgiving feast.

All across cyberland people are participating in “thankful” challenges. Facebook, Twitter, and bloggers all have people posting daily, or weekly about their thanks.

What if you don’t feel thankful? What if your world has been turned upside down, inside out, shaken and beaten?

Guess what? Now is when acknowledging our blessing is a blessing to us. It’s not necessary to feel thankful to voice our thanks. Click to tweet.

How do you acknowledge thanks when you don’t feel thankful?

That was my question a couple of years after my husband died. Before that I don’t think I even considered being thankful, I was in too much pain.

However, as November approached I wanted to be thankful.The question was, how could I be thankful when I wanted things they way they were.

Expressing gratitude is a grief healing tool. As I found reasons to be thankful  my mood lightened and my outlook on life improved.

Other reasons to be grateful occurred. It was like a snowball, one idea led to another, and then another. Click to tweet. Until finally I realized I had a lot of reasons to be grateful and express my gratitude.

A New Twist on Thanks.

As my gratitude list grew I noticed that many of them were a result of knowing, loving, and being married to David. What if I used my November Thankfulness to focus on those gifts from him?

Not just physical items, like the cedar chest he bought me, or the complete set of dishes, or the myriad of other items he presented to me. Although, there is reason to be thankful for those gifts too.

However, less about money and more about people, feelings, and emotions.

I’ve repeated that twist every year since. Yes, sometimes the thanks are repeated each year, but that’s okay, I’m thankful or them each year.

The People

I start with people he brought into our lives, my life. Our children and grandchildren. Not only would I not know them, they wouldn’t exist. I’m glad they do and am grateful they are all in my life.

Other people too are a reason for thanks.

My children’s significant others, My husband’s siblings, friends we made over the years, his colleagues, all are people worth knowing. People who enriched my life.


I Never would have seen the inside of a livestock barn if it hadn’t been for my husband. Can’t imagine stepping on Oklahoma State University Campus if it weren’t for him. Towns we drove through, or stopped and lived in for a while. All are reasons to give thanks.


Attending  livestock show was a new adventure for me, one he made enjoyable. There were the births of our children, and grandchildren, events I was privileged to enjoy. Over the years there were so many experiences I could probably spend the whole month on them.


Are you doing a ‘thankful challenge’ anywhere? Online, in your journal? In your thoughts?

What gifts did your husband leave you with that you are thankful to have?

Join me on Facebook at:  Follow Your Rainbow

For more ideas on surviving widowhood check out my book




About Nita

Quilter, writer, speaker, mom and grandmom. I enjoy making quilts for my grandkids, and other children. I especially love hearing and sharing quilt stories with others, that's how the book came about and this blog will continue to share quilt stories and how God works with quilts to comfort and teach us.
This entry was posted in grief healing tools, holidays and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s