The other day a friend asked, “Does social media enhance the grief and keep one stuck in the pain or help move through the grief.”
There are of course support groups online that are a great help, especially to those who live in outlying areas, or have few friends and family to help them. However, she was taking about those posts we see online about a favorite relative (aunt, grandparent, cousin, etc.) or immediate family member (parent, sibling) and how much the person is missed and life will never be the same without them in it. Often, the deceased has been gone five, six, or more years.
Of course there is no limit on the length of time for grief, we will always miss the person who died, and no, life isn’t the same. But life isn’t the same from one year to the next, one month to the next, even one day to the next, without throwing death into the mix.
The holiday when we were in our teens is much different than the holiday when we are older. Life changes.
Yes, we will always miss our loved ones. Yes, their absence will always be felt. Yes, we will talk about them from time to time.
However, if we continue to focus on their departure. If we only see the pain and never acknowledge the happiness that has entered our lives through other venues can we grow? Can we adjust to the different life?
Mourning the death of a loved one is natural. Hanging on to the pain of their death causes us more grief, and keeps us from the joy that waits.